Slang for Poker Hands

If you play or watch Texas Hold'em at all, you'll start hearing people announce they've got "Big Slick" or "I've got snowmen!" They're not being literal -- they're talking about the hole or pocket cards they've been dealt in the lingo of poker.

Learn the slang for poker hands so when you hear these nicknames while playing Texas Hold'em, you'll know what everyone is talking about.

Think you already know all the poker lingo? Prove it by acing the poker slang quiz!

A-A – American Airlines, bullets, pocket rockets

A-K – Big Slick, “Walking back to Houston”

A-J -- Ajax

K-K – Cowboys

K-Q – Marriage

K-J – Kojak

K-9 -- Canine

Q-Q – Dames, divas, ladies, the Hilton sisters, Siegfried & Roy

Q-J – Maverick, Oedipus Rex

Q-7 -- Computer Hand

Q-3 – A San Francisco Busboy (a queen with a trey – har har)

J-J – Jokers, hooks

J-9 – T.J. Cloutier.

J-5 – Jackson Five, Motown

10-5 – Five and dime

10-2 – Doyle Brunson. (He won two World Series of Poker titles with this hand.)

9-9 – Meat hooks

8-8 – Snowmen, Octopuses

7-7 – Hockey Sticks, walking Sticks

7-2 – The Hammer

5-5 – Nickels, presto, speed limit

5-4 – Jesse James, for his Colt .45

4-4 -- Sailboats

2-2 -- Ducks

Basic Poker Tells

One of the key skills most good poker players have is the ability to read their opponents at the table. That is why you hear so much about “poker tells.” A “tell” is any physical reaction, kind of behavior, or habit that gives (or tells) the other players information about your hand. If you learn the most common tells, you can not only watch your own behavior to make sure your body language isn’t telling all your secrets, but also watch for the habits and tics in the poker players you’re at the table with. If you can accurately read your opponent’s tells, you’ll make the right decisions against them more often and win more money.

Everyone has their own unique tics and tells, and it’s great to watch individuals and pick up on their unique tells. Luckily, there are also a few involuntary and common tells that you can watch for even the first time you sit down with someone. As a general rule, remember that when a player acts strong, he’s probably weak, and when a player acts weak, he's probably got a really strong hand.

Poker Tells that Say "I Have a Good Hand!"

* Acting Uninterested in a Hand While Still in It
This is usually a sign of a strong hand. The player is pretending that he’s not excited about his cards – but he is.

* Shaking Hands
During a hand, if you notice a player’s hands are shaking as she places her bet, she probably has gotten a really, really good hand. Perhaps the nuts.

* Rapid Breathing
Some players can control the shakes, but it's harder to control the automatic heart-racing that comes when you see pocket aces or hit the flop really hard. If you can see a player's chest visibly rising and falling, they have an excellent hand

* Sighing and Shrugging
If a player makes a show of sighing or shrugging, and says things like “Oh, I guess I’ll call,” or even “Why am I calling?” he probably is overacting and is trying to hide a big hand.

* Glancing at Chips After Looking at Hole Cards
When a player looks down and sees strong hole or pocket cards, she may glance over at her chips to see just how much she can bet.

Poker Tells that Say "I Have a Weak Hand!"

* Staring Down Other Players
If an opponent is staring you down, he’s trying to represent strength. Usually though, he has a weak hand – he might have something, but it’s something that can be beaten or drawn out on.

* Holding Breath
Often, inexperienced players will hold their breath if they are bluffing.

Poker Tells that Say "I Have a Drawing Hand."

* Checking Hole Cards After a Flop
If the flop shows the possibility of giving someone a flush or straight draw, watch for people re-checking their hole cards. They’re checking to see if they have a piece of it – whether that black Ace was a spade or a club. The player doesn’t have the flush or straight at that point, because if they did, they wouldn’t have to check, but she is seeing if she has a draw to it.

* Taking a Long Time Before Calling a Bet
If a player looks into the pot and seems to be doing some calculating in his head, he probably is. He’s most likely figuring out the pot odds to see if it’s worth it to try and catch the cards he needs to complete his drawing hand.


A final note: more experienced players may give off false tells, so the first thing to read about other players is if they’re novices or pros.

Top 10 Best Hold'em Poker Hands

Here's a quick guide to the ten best Texas Hold'em poker hands. If you start with any of these ten hands during Texas Hold'em, you are in excellent shape.

For a more detailed guide to which hands to hold and which to fold, read Texas Hold'em Starting Hand Selection.

1. Ace-Ace
This is the best Hold'em poker hand you can hope to have. It's the best of the best, and will win more than any other hand. Also known as American Airlines, pocket rockets, and bullets.

2. King-King
This 2nd-best hold'em hand is still incredibly strong and will win you a good chunk of change. Two kings, or "cowboys" are only dominated by aces.

3. Queen-Queen
Two queens, or "ladies" are a very good hand. Sure, kings and aces will beat you, but you've got the upper hand on jacks and below.

4. Ace-King
Ace-king is a strong but tricky hand. It is the strongest of the drawing hands, but the flop needs to work with you to give you a pair of aces or kings for it to really pay off. Suited it is slightly stronger than unsuited, as then you can also make the nut flush much more easily.

5. Jack-Jack
A pair of jacks, ten-handed, will win almost 20% of the time. If the flop shows a queen, king, or ace, watch out, but otherwise, it's smooth sailing.

6. Ace-Queen
Ace-queen is the second best drawing hand, and when suited, will win about 20% of the time as well.

7. King-Queen
King-queen, especially suited, is a great drawing hand that is only afraid of an Ace falling on the board.

8. Ace-Jack
Ace-jack is another great drawing hand. Suited is always better here, but unsuited is still playable.

9. King-Jack
King-jack, especially in later positions, is a fine hand to play, but can be beat by any of the hands listed above and should be folded to big raises. Statistically, suited it will win just under 19% of the time, but unsuited that drops to just 15%.

10. Ace-Ten
Ace-ten is still a good hand -- you've got the ace, and can make a straight if the miracle J-Q-K falls on the board. But be wary of playing it too strong, especially unsuited, as if all you end up with is a pair of aces, you may be out-kicked.

Top 10 Worst Starting Hands in Texas Hold'em

Sure, you know that a pair of aces are the best hand in Texas Hold'em, but do you know the worst starting hands? Knowing that these hands are almost-always-fold'em hands in hold'em is just as important to improving your poker game and not playing like a donkey.

Some of these "worst hands" are bad in the same way and will lose at about the same rate, so I've called them ties, even when one is a slightly better hand.

1) 2-7
7-2 off suit is considered the worst hand in Texas Hold'em. They are the lowest two cards you can have that cannot make a straight (there's 4 cards between 2 and 7). Even if they are suited, they will make you a very low flush, and if either pairs, it's an awfully low hand.

Because it is the worst, some players will play it for fun and in online games, it is known as "the hammer."

2) 2-8
This is the same basic problem as above, only you've got an 8 instead of a 7. Still pretty bad for a high card. Suited or not, this is a fold'em hold'em hand.

3) Tie: 3-8 & 3-7
The 3 makes this hand able to beat the two above it, but with the 3-8 you still can't make a straight and the 3-7 still, well, just sucks.

4) 2-6
While if the board gives you a miracle flop of 3-4-5, you will have a straight, someone with a 6-7 will have a higher straight. If you get a flush, someone will probably have a higher flush. Against even 4 players, this hand will lose about 90% of the time. Not good odds.

5) Tie: 2-9, 3-9, & 4-9
The only thing these three hands have going for them over the hands above is the 9. If the 9 pairs, you'll have a middle pair that could still be beat by anyone holding pocket 10s, jacks, queens, kings, or aces, yet you might be fooled by a board filled with low cards into thinking you have the best hand and losing a lot of money. No straights can fill the gap between these cards, either. Beware.

6) 2-10
This hand has a legendary quality because Doyle Brunson captured two World Series of Poker Bracelets with it. But it's not a good hand -- Doyle Brunson is one of the all-time best in the game and unless you're a Texas road gambler who's logged thousands of hours at the table, you shouldn't try and win with the Doyle Brunson.

7) 5-9
Another hand people play because it's fun is the old 9 to 5, the "Dolly Parton." If you're playing to win, it's not a good idea to play hands because they have a funny name. That may be how you pick the winning horse in a race, but poker's a marathon, not a sprint, and over the long term there's no doubt this hand is a statistical loser.

8) Tie: 4-7, 4-8, 5-8, 3-6...
All these hands will rarely win, especially unsuited. Toss 'em. Just toss'em. Yes, even in the little blind. If you see two low cards in the hole, unless you're in the big blind and you can see the flop for free, fold.

9) Face card + low card, unsuited
One of the most common mistakes I see beginners make is that when they see any paint in their hand, they play it. J-2, Q-3, K-4 whatever -- and most of these hands are losers. They're junk that may win a few pots, but more often will lose you huge cash when you find the other player has a higher kicker and the winning hand.

10) Ace + low card, unsuited
This is another common beginner mistake, playing any ace. Again, it may win occasionally, and heads-up it's a fine hand, but at a table of 4 or more, this hand shouldn't be played if there's a raise in front of you. You're going to be outkicked a lot with Ace-little, and it's going to feel like a kick in the junk when the other player shows their higher ace.